Comedy Phonetic Alphabet – Free Download

Lots of us working with call centres have got used to the common use of the phonetic alphabet.

The use of A for Alpha, B for Bravo and C for Charlie has become a daily occurrence. Every now and again we get to see the funny way it is used or misused – such as “N for Knickers”.

When I was clearing out my Dad’s old papers I came across a comedy phonetic alphabet that started with “A is for ‘Orses” (Hay is for Horses) and “B for Mutton” (Beef or Mutton). I think that it was taken from a music hall sketch that Arthur Askey recored during the Second World War.

I think that this originated as the Surrealist Alphabet by Clapham and Dwyer sometime before the war, and it has also been named the Cockney Alphabet.

The original recording can be heard here

Modern Fun Phonetic Alphabet

I have updated this to a modern version that should be easier to follow in modern times.

Letter	Fun Phonetic Phrase	Translation
A	A is for Horses	Hay is for Horses
B	B for Chicken	Beef or Chicken
C	C for Miles	See for Miles
D	D for Rent	Different
E	E for Way	Either Way
F	F for Vescence	Effervescence
G	G for Police	Chief of Police
H	H for Himself	Each for Himself
I	I for an Eye	Eye for an Eye
J	J for a Good Time	Did You Have a Good Time
K	K for Teria	Cafeteria
L	L for Leather	Hell for Leather
M	M for Sis	Emphasis
N	N for Mation	Information
O	O for the Hills and Far Away	Over the Hills and Far Away
P	P for Relief	Pee for Relief
Q	Q for a Call Centre	Queue for a Call Centre
R	R for Loaf	Half a Loaf
S	S for You	It’s for You
T	T for Two	Tea for Two
U	U for Me	You for Me
V	V for España	Viva España
W	W for Quits	Double or Quits
X	X for Breakfast	Eggs for Breakfast
Y	Y for Husband	Wife or Husband
Z	Z for a Doctor	Send for a Doctor

Printable Modern Fun Phonetic Alphabet

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Get your free download of the Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet now:

Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet Free Download

Free Modern Fun Phonetic Alphabet in Printable PDF Format
Version:	1
Date Added:	5 August 2022
File Type:	pdf
File Size:	127 KB
Category:	Tools
Download Link:	Download

Download Free Modern Comedy Phonetic Alphabet in Editable Word Format

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Original Funny Phonetic Alphabet

Although if you are looking for the original, I have put this together below:

Letter	Funny Phonetic Phrase	Translation
A	A is for Horses	Hay is for Horses
B	B for Chicken	Beef or Chicken
C	C for Islanders	Seaforth Highlanders
D	D for Ential	Deferential
E	E for Adam	Eve or Adam
F	F for Vescence	Effervescence
G	G for Police	Chief of Police
H	H for Respect	Age for Respect
I	I for Novello	Ivor Novello
J	J for Oranges	Jaffa Oranges
K	K for Answers	Kay Francis
L	L for Leather	Hell for Leather
M	M for Sis	Emphasis
N	N for A Dig	In for a Dig
O	O for The Garden Wall	Over the Garden Wall
P	P for Penny	Pee for a Penny
Q	Q for Song	Cue for Song
R	R for Mo	Half a Mo’
S	S for You	It’s for You
T	T for Two	Tea for Two
U	U for Films	You for Films?
V	V for La France	Vive La France
W	W for A Bob	I’ll double you for a Bob
X	X for Breakfast	Eggs for Breakfast
Y	Y for God’s Sake	Why for God’s Sake
Z	Z for a Breeze	Zephyr Breeze